two twenty eight

the journal of a positive person

Posts Tagged ‘guilt

The Rhythm of Normalcy

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As time passes, normalcy sets in.  All things are this way.  When the sun sets, I get tired.  And if I leave the curtains open, when the sun rises, I wake up.  My diet, mostly vegan, is pretty normal to me.  It’s strange then to go home where being “vegan” is weird and leftist.  

My homosexuality is now normal.  In a way, I never imagined.  Being with S, really makes me feel normal.  I take a pill at night, along with a daily vitamin.  And that now, is starting to feel normal.  Just something I have to make sure I do. 

I’m very afraid of skipping a dose.  As that can cause mutation and resistance.  Something, I’m deadly afraid of.  I’m muscle sore today from my work out yesterday – it feels good.  Although, my intake of food has increased, so, I feel I’m destined to keep this belly flab.  

On a different note, I find it wonderful that music is so mathematical.  Today, I read that two minutes and forty two seconds is a perfect length for a pop song.  Michelle from the Beatles and about 30 songs from my iTunes library are now in a playlist.

I’m enjoying it so far.  

I recently saw this:

 

This is video following a lioness who had been raised by a trainer and then reintroduced into the wild.  After a few years, they reunite to wonderous and beautiful affections of love.  Such a grand display of the unusual and awesome.  

How the Earth just loves us.  Even the most of vicious.

To S’s dismissal, there was a small part of me that felt guilty for trying so desperately to kill the virus inside me.  He told me not to personify the virus – but for some reason, I have.  Of course, that’s a silly thought and getting rid of the virus in anyway is good.  

But it was a strange sensation to feel guilt.  For hating something.  Something that would destroy me.  Like the lion here and his friendly and caregiving friend, a man.

Written by twotwentyeight

April 18, 2008 at 11:02 am

Posted in Daily Life

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